Sex is supposed to be intimate, private, and if there’s an aspect of it either you or your partner seem to be struggling with, it can be hard to admit it in the first place. Sexual issues can range from a lack of connection and intimacy, to more physical problems like erectile dysfunction, low sex drive, or premature ejaculation.
Though for some of these issues, there are actual medications or over-the-counter solutions, many people turn to sex therapy as an option, since simply sometimes talking about the issues, and learning the right techniques, can make all the difference when it comes to your sex life.
Sex therapy: What To Expect
Sex therapy, in general, doesn’t differ much from other ideas or forms of therapy as far as methodology. First and foremost, your therapist is likely to talk with you and your partner about any emotional issues either of you may be having, either on your own, or with each other.
Traumatic experiences, stress, depression, etc. can all affect your sex life, and this is something your therapist will want to learn right away before continuing.
From there, a sex therapist will likely try to find out what each person involved wants from a healthy sexual relationship. Desires, turn ons, turn offs, etc. With issues like performance anxiety or low libido, it can be very helpful simply to establish lines of open communication within a relationship, and a therapist can help do that by asking the right questions and encouraging the right discussions.
Should I Go Solo?
It’s completely up to you to decide if you would like to attend sex therapy as a couple, or an individual. If you decide to start going alone, eventually your therapist may ask if you would like to bring your partner in, or they might suggest that it would be beneficial to do so.
Typically, if the problem you’re struggling with concerns both you and your partner, it’s a good idea to consider going together. This will make communication much easier throughout the therapy sessions, and when you go home.
Homework Is A Good Thing
Speaking of communication at home, there’s a good chance a sex therapist will give you ‘tasks’ after every session to take home with you. Consider it your homework, whether it’s just for you, or for both you and your partner. This ‘homework’ can be anything from different ways of communicating, sharing thoughts and feelings, to actual sexual acts or techniques recommended by your therapist.
The whole idea is to feel closer, more comfortable, to ignite connections, and to overcome any physical struggles (erectile dysfunction, etc.) that may have been occurring lately.
Is It Right For Me?
Sex therapy isn’t for everyone, and it’s important to decide if it’s the right choice for you, your partner, or both.
While it is one of many options when it comes to bettering your overall sexual health, it’s important to consider how comfortable you’ll be with it. That being said, finding the right sex therapist is equally important. It can pay to ‘shop around’, until you find someone you’re comfortable with, both personality-wise, and through their methods.
If you’re in the United States, you can check out the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists, and you’ll be able to find a sex therapist near you.
Otherwise, a little time spent researching local sex therapists and learning more about them will definitely be worth your while.
Sex therapy can dive into quite a bit of intimate thoughts and feelings, and can bring you out of your comfort zone in some of the best ways possible. Whether you’re struggling emotionally in your sex life, or physically, it can be a great solution for anyone willing to open up, communicate with their therapist, themselves, and their partner, and anyone who wants to take control of their sex life once again.